Thursday, December 8, 2016

Excerpt From a Book That Remains Unwritten

I got to the doctor and was finally called in, I followed the nurse, my parents not far behind. We get to the room and sit down. Little did we know, we wouldn't be the same people walking out of the room as we were those walking in. 

The nurse stayed and talked to us, trying to make jokes and make us laugh. At this point all I wanted was to hear that everything was fine so I could leave and get to class. After what seemed like an eternity, she leaves and the doctor finally comes in. She shakes my parents hands and gets right to it. I remember her exact words “I’m very sorry to say this but it is thyroid cancer.” I know she kept talking after she had said that but I heard nothing else, all I remember is that my feet went numb. Completely numb, as if they hadn't ever existed. 

I looked at my parents and saw faces looking back at me that I had never seen before. I hadn't started crying yet, I couldn't process what was going on. “Cancer? What is that? I have cancer? I cant have cancer, I have class in a few hours. I’m graduating and going away to school next year. I don't have time for this.” My mom gets up and walks to my side and hugs me and suddenly I’m dragged back into this nightmare. 

That’s all this is right? A nightmare. I’m going to wake up and everything will be fine. Again, with the reassuring that everything was going to be fine. Well now it wasn’t, and that was a fact. Nothing was fine. How could it be? I decide to start listening to the doctor as she discusses treatment options. 

One thing I will never forget her saying was that my odds were very good and that I had a great chance of beating this.

 A great chance of beating this?! I couldn't believe the words I was hearing. I was sitting there as a nineteen year old girl being told I had cancer and that my odds were “pretty good”. As if I had any other option other then to beat this. I have my entire life ahead of me and this woman is standing in front of me saying that I had a good chance of beating this. 

Clearly she didn't know me that well. 

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